Tuesday, 20 November 2012

Guest Post: Personalised Christmas Cards – The Good, The Bad and The Ugly…

Inappropriate, unflattering, confusing and downright scary personalised greetings cards have become a menace that many of us have to deal with every year.

A photograph of the family sent round as a Christmas card sounds like a nice idea to share with your friends and relatives; it’s a way to stay in touch, and to remind people who you may not see very often what you actually look like! It’s certainly more unique than a mailing dozens of generic Christmassy images to your nearest and dearest.

However, some people seem to show a worrying lack of judgement, verging on a complete break from sanity, when they’re taking these pictures.

Take this example; I’d be genuinely horrified to receive this in the post. I’d honestly rather receive a credit card bill after a month of binging on online casinos and buying novelty t-shirts on Amazon!

Looking at this photo-shopped effort, it becomes obvious that the offending family have included their pets. Not only is this sad, it’s factually inaccurate; everyone knows cats can’t sing. The closest they get to carrying a tune is the perfectly pitched retching sounds they make before vomiting on your bed.

Pregnancy pictures like this are usually hideously embarrassing for all involved, doubly so for the unborn child. I pity the kid; these people are its parents! Can you imagine the ridicule it would suffer if this photo were ever posted on the internet to be viewed by billions?

Argh! What is that? Some sort of orange-tinged alien is about to attack that family! Kill it before it devours the children!!

Nothing says “Merry Christmas” like a skin tight PVC sexy-Santa dress. Also, that little boy looks dangerously close to snapping his own ankle like a twig. He’s probably using the pain to distract himself from the mortifying display just a few feet to his left.

I wouldn’t blame that cat if it were plotting the murder of its owner. In fact, I’d give the cat an alibi. “Yes officer, he was at my place all night playing poker and drinking beer. I’ve no idea how his owner came to be brutally stabbed in the stomach. Maybe it was an accident while he was shaving?”

Seriously, if you’re going to create a personalised Christmas card with pictures of your family then choose a good picture (which isn’t going to make you a laughing stock/social pariah). Personal cards can be a really nice touch and leave people feeling valued and connected to you at Christmas, just make sure you don’t get carried away and somehow find yourself in front of a camera naked except for a Santa hat and some carefully arranged leaves!

~ These and other images can be found at http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/
Bonus points for anyone who spotted the Blackadder reference.

* Disclaimer: I received payment for hosting this very tongue in cheek guest post. It is to be taken in jest and in no way intended to offend the cat lovers out there :).


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